Well, That Was A Nice Idea

Video blogging on a globe trotting adventure sounded good when I started. Traveling to “first world” European countries seemed like a no brainer. I’ll shoot some video and upload it to YouTube. Ha! We have not had decent wireless internet access since landing in the UK. We’ve had AirBnBs in London, Fort William, Edinburgh, and Belfast and not a single internet connection could hold a candle to the worst days of Charter Communication’s Spectrum service back home. No joke This is is pathetic. 10 Mbps is the fastest we’ve had in 2 1/2 weeks. This beautiful Belfast apartment seems like the perfect lodging; fourth floor, modern apartment penthouse overlooking the ghetto…err city. Yet, we’ve managed a paltry 1.6 Mbps upload and .5 Mbps upload. Might as well be the 4th fucking century. Not sure why you’d list “WiFie” as one of the features of your AirBnB if in fact a set of semefore flags would be a better option for shouting out to the world.

Propaganda at the Titanic Experience in Belfast

Yeah, I know some of you pricks will say “fuck you Jack, you’re spending 2 1/2 weeks abroad! First world problems! You need to turn off your phone and enjoy the moment.” Well, I say screw that! I’m a 21st century asshole that wants to stay connected while I’m traveling other first world modern countries. I’ve got shit to do…granted, none of it matters in the grand scheme of things. I’m reasonable. If I were in the middle of the outback in Australia or the Amazon jungle I’d expect difficulties connecting. But I’m not. I’m in the fucking UK.

Anyway, my point is that I’m unable to upload my goofy videos until I get the hell out of this third world shithole called Belfast City. Ok, it’s not really all that bad of a city. Our last cab driver referred to it as a “shite hole!” Cab drivers are interesting characters. They tell you shit you’d be happy to live the rest of your life not knowing. For example, Northern Ireland has seen peace only since 1998 or so. The “Troubles” have finally come to an end. It seems Belfast might not be rocked by car bombs anymore, but sectarian conflict still erupts. Specifically in July and August. They riot in the streets as part of some goofy holiday. It’s like the whole city goes nuts and it’s like 1968 all over again. Ugh. Fucking people. Not that America has it any better. It took a black president to remind us what racist cunts we are. Now we have a Jagoff-in-Chief. I refuse to say his name…



About heartajack

I'm a graphic designer and occasional filmmaker that recently discovered the awesomeness that is the Can-Am Spyder Roadster. In recent years I've become obsessed with food and learning how to prepare it. I make the best damn ribs...EVER.
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