Good God! All Signs Point To Fail!

I can only laugh at the compounding failures on this trip. Garmin Zumo GPS has been locking up since Colorado. No idea why. The shitty ass Scala Rider helmet communicator’s shoddy build quality makes it so I can’t listen to music on the trip because the mini pin connectors are all loose or the wires are already coming apart. $500 for this piece of shit that I got a week before the trip. The latest bit of shit to rain down on me is the tear in my stuff sack, the one I carry my tent and sleeping bag in. How about the nasty burn I got this morning when I grabbed the butane stove, that I used to make coffee this morning, while it was still shooting out invisible flames. Did I mention my motorcycle gloves are falling apart and that all the Velcro straps on my jacket seem to be failing at once?

On the plus side, the Spyder mishap last night didn’t affect it’s driving performance this morning. I was also glad I brought extra engine oil with me. The thing was totally empty! Whoops.

I need to find a Best Buy or an REI or some shit to see if I can replace some of my messed up gear.

I have to laugh because even the latte at this McDonalds was fucked. I added sugar to it, not knowing these idiots already put some in there. I’m done with this place!

The weather is nice…

That’s right, try to stay positive…


Oh, that’s right, as soon as you do something manly, like vehicle maintenance, the fun blazes and the humidity climbs!

Get me to Atlanta, please! I need some of Scott’s Kraken Spiced Rum!

The Mophie Juice Pack piece of shit broke on me. Once again, shoddy components broke. The non-standard mini-USB connector broke.

Love technology.


About heartajack

I'm a graphic designer and occasional filmmaker that recently discovered the awesomeness that is the Can-Am Spyder Roadster. In recent years I've become obsessed with food and learning how to prepare it. I make the best damn ribs...EVER.
This entry was posted in Can-Am Spyder, Epic Ride 2: The Quickening, motorcycle and tagged , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

2 Responses to Good God! All Signs Point To Fail!

  1. At least you didn’t get pulled over like I did this morning. See … there’s a silver lining for you….smile 🙂

    • heartajack says:

      Well, not sure I should feel better by way of your misery, but I’ll take it! Everything is going well now. Took care of my little problems in Roanoke and it’s been smooth sailing since.

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